Actually Helping the One You Love: Book List

Forgiveness: Part 2 It's Too Risky Not To

We know from science and Biblical law that the unforgiveness of others will develop into cancer and poisonous applications both literally and figuratively. Forgoing the forgiveness of others is a form of torture where we are lamenting and perhaps recreating offenses over and over instead of healing and moving forward mentally and spiritually. It is an extremely unhealthy preoccupation. It says in Matthew 18:23-25 that you (the one who does not forgive) will be turned to the torturers! Not only are we torturing ourselves but we will be turned thrown to them either way. Do we want to endure this cycle for our own pride? Our own sense of entitlement to lord over others? For our own pleasure? Is it really worth it? Is it working? Are you healing? 

Again, with the risk being so high physically, spiritually, and mentally is it worth the constant replay? Is begrudging someone feel like a win? Instead of the anguish, let us forgive as we have been forgiven and avoid the reality unforgiveness can cause. 

How do we then forgive? It is not always easy and perhaps we do not "want" to, but we must. WE simply must. It really can be done in 3 steps: 

1. We make the choice. We choose to forgive as we have been forgiven. If the "feeling" doesn't come, choose anyway. God promises to heal you and your heart. 

2. We depend on God to help us do it. He is always listening to our cries for help. 

3. We obey the Bible. 

Do this and you will be well. Do this and you will have peace. Listen to the show for more on this issue and a more in depth discussion.


Forgiveness: Part 1 Are you Paco?

Here is an excerpt from a blog written by Duane Vander Klok for Walking by Faith

Ernest Hemingway’s short story about the broken relationship between a

Spanish father and his teenage son, Paco, highlights this desire.

Paco ran away from his home to Madrid, and his grieving father looked

everywhere for him. In desperation, the father placed an ad in the Madrid

newspaper that read,

“Dear Paco, meet me in front of the newspaper office tomorrow at noon. All is

forgiven. I love you.”

The next morning, 800 hopeful men named Paco were standing in front of the

newspaper office!

Are you Paco? Are you in desperate need of forgiveness? Does your heart ache for the relief? This process, a gift given to us ultimately through Christ, is a beautiful perfect gift that not only benefits the recipient but the person granting the forgiveness in a multitude of ways. 

But before we confirm whether or not you are Paco, let's get straight to the point: have you forgiven yourself through Christ who grants it to you freely without score? Without score, without holding onto hurt, and with your focus on letting go have you forgiven yourself? Do you have a willingness to forgive yourself to gain a long lasting internal peace. Is this you? Have you truly forgotten to forgive yourself? Paco's father may forgive him, but he must forgive himself in order to gain. 

Harboring unforgiveness in your heart weighs you down and takes up a large amount of precious real estate of your mental and emotional state. Your mental health, social health, emotional health, physical health all rely on your ability to forgive yourself. Christ has already forgiven you, its your turn.